We are uninvited settlers occupying the stolen, territories of the xʷməθkwəy̓əm (Musqueam), Skwxwú7mesh (Squamish), S’ólh Téméxw (Stó:lō), Səl̓ílwətaʔ/Selilwitulh (Tsleil-Waututh), Qayqayt, and kʷikʷəƛ̓əm (Kwikwetlem) peoples. Our relationship with these lands dictates our commitment to understanding the ongoing impacts of colonization and decolonizing our practices in and out of the counselling room.
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As relational beings, there are not many areas of our life more impactful to our wellness than our relationships. Unfortunately, we are often not supported in developing the skills and dynamics that support fulfilling relationships, leading to more and more feelings of isolation as we go about our lives.
Relationship counselling supports all relationships, including romantic partners, friendships and family members and all relational structures, including heterosexual, queer, monogamous, and polyamorous relationships. Folx often begin relationship counselling to resolve interpersonal issues and events related to trust, intimacy, communication and conflicting points of view. Folx may also seek relationship counselling to explore ways to best support each other through difficult challenges that might be showing up in life.
Whatever the prompt for seeking it, relationship counselling can help each person understand the other/s in a deeper way, and feel more seen, emotionally held, and aligned with one another, while nurturing growing connection.
At Venturous, we incorporate many approaches to relationship counselling, depending on you are be experiencing. These approaches include Transformative Justice, Internal Family Systems (IFS), Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT), and the Gottman method.
Relationship counselling emphasizes the dynamics between the people in the relationship. For this reason, the beginning sessions focus on exploring the relationship goals that each person has, in addition to working together to co-create an environment that feels safe enough for each person in the room. You might also find engaging in relationship counselling and individual counselling at the same time to be a very complimentary and supportive approach.
Throughout the counselling process, your therapist will act as a facilitator, helping to create a safer and more supportive environment for open communication while pointing out dynamics that they might see in session as you engage with each other. Sessions may involve various exercises and techniques tailored to the specific needs of the relationship, such as role-playing, guided discussions, or homework assignments. Your therapist may also provide tools and strategies for improving communication, managing conflict, and strengthening emotional bonds outside of the therapy sessions. As the counselling progresses, partners, friends, and family members often gain new insights into their relationship dynamics and develop more fulfilling ways of relating to one another.
As with all therapies, there are potential impacts to be aware of. General considerations specific to Relationship Counselling include temporary increases in emotional discomfort or conflict as sensitive issues are addressed. Some partners, friends, or family members might feel vulnerable or exposed during the process. There's also a possibility that counselling could reveal incompatibilities or deep-seated issues that may lead to difficult decisions about the future of the relationship. Your therapist will help support you in navigating these impacts as you move through the relational process to find a resolution that takes into account the needs and well-being of everyone involved.
Relationship Counselling can be a standalone practice or engaged in conjunction with individual services. Our relationship counsellors have specialized training in most, if not all, of the approaches listed. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to book a free consult with one of our therapists!
Transformative Justice for relationships is an approach that addresses harm and conflict without relying on punitive measures. It focuses on healing, accountability, and community support. This method encourages partners, friends, and family members to look at and address the root of relational conflicts as a team, while supporting each other to take accountability for their actions, understand the impact of behaviours, and work together to create lasting change. By emphasizing open communication, empathy, and collective problem-solving, Transformative Justice helps partners, friends, and family members build stronger, more resilient relationships. It also acknowledges the broader social context of relationships, addressing systemic issues that contribute to interpersonal challenges.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) for relationships focuses on understanding the different "parts" within each partner, friend, or family member of your relationship and how they interact in the relationship dynamic. This approach helps each partner, friend, or family member in your relationship identify and address their own internal conflicts, leading to improved self-awareness and communication. By recognizing and working with these parts, you and your partner(s), friend(s), and/or family member(s) can develop greater empathy for each other and create a more harmonious relationship. IFS can be particularly effective in addressing patterns of conflict, trust issues, and emotional disconnection, facilitating growth of the relational dynamic.
Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for relationships emphasizes the importance of emotional connection and attachment between partners, friends, and family members. This approach helps partners, friends, and family members identify and express their underlying emotions, fostering a deeper understanding of each other's needs and vulnerabilities. By creating a safer space for emotional exploration, EFT enables partners, friends, and family members to break negative interaction cycles and develop more secure bonds. This method is particularly effective in addressing issues related to emotional distance, conflict resolution, and rebuilding trust. Through EFT, partners, friends, and family members can learn to respond to each other's emotional cues more effectively, leading to increased intimacy and satisfaction in their relationship.
The Gottman Method is a research-based approach to relationship counselling that focuses on strengthening the foundation of relationships. It emphasizes nine components of fulfilling and nourishing relationships, including building love maps, sharing fondness and admiration, and managing conflict constructively. This method helps relationships experience improve communication, increase intimacy, and develop problem-solving skills. By learning to recognize and address the "Four Horsemen" of relationship breakdown (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling), partners, friends, and family members can create a more positive and lasting connection. The Gottman Method also incorporates practical exercises and tools to help support building a solid foundation for relationships.
